From the age of 17-20, I was extremely suicidal. Most people were unaware of this because I hid my inner turmoil behind a big smile. But the pain was real and it eventually became more than I could bear…..
Tag Archives: God
The pendulum between catastrophe and optimism
Overcome with hopelessness and shame, I nervously paced each room of my empty house. The only thing louder than the desolate silence were the thoughts that came across my mind.
The freedom of rejection
Rarely, do we greet the word, “No” with instant gratitude. Feelings of dissapointment and rejection are not always easy to face. Nevertheless, they undoubtedly lead us to a blank canvas that is waiting for us to co-create the next chapter in our life’s journey. When facing dissapointment, never forget that God is working all thingsContinue reading “The freedom of rejection”
Free to be
So, when others ridicule you, remember that in actuality they are ridiculing your creator…… and that’s not something that should ever be taken lightly.
There is no need to pretend to be someone that you are not. God loves you as you are. Your current circumstance never changes the amount of love that He has for you. Rest in that truth instead of soaking in self-dissatisfaction. God made no mistake when He created you. He delights in you andContinue reading “Stop pretending”
The day I decided to break free from the curse of poverty
In middle school, I had a realization that life on our farm was more complicated, than I pictured it to be. This realization came to me during my induction to the National Junior Honor Society. The night before, my mother and I had gotten into an argument over what I would wear.
11 personal sins that I choose to confess and renounce
What you find below is my confession to a bundle of personal practices that have caused many pain and heartache. So here it goes……
Just a reminder that there is never a second in which you are not loved. – Go out and shine His love right there where you are at today. – Type “❤” if you agree. 👇👇👇 – – Unapologetically yours, John Eli
Soul Butter Station vol. 4 (Captured “live”/Isla Vista Worship)
Although I am already an avid fan of acoustic sets, I find myself in a deeper level of musical euphoria when gospocentric stories of grace are linked into the melody. This describes my exact experience when I recently heard Mark Bowen’s (of Isla Vista Worship) live performance of their new single, “Captured.”
Why my 7 hour drive was worth it….
Approximately three years ago, I found myself dragging my soul through the darkest corridor I’ve ever traveled through. It didn’t help that I created this mess myself. Somewhere along the line of trying to navigate life outside of my calling….